Just another day....

*blink blink*


Beyond my deepest wishes, here I am once again. Sitting in the dark with just the TV on, a glass of wine and the company of an old friend – Habit! (it has been a while)

“how do I keep ending up here?”, I ask habit.

He just looks at me and shrugs and encourages me to refill my glass (it does feel a little better when the glass is full). I feel like a mess but strangely, the mess is encouraging because it reminds me that even super woman has a bad day once in a while except that this is starting to feel way more then ‘once-in-a-while’ *sigh*

Maybe the point is not to try stand up anymore. Maybe the point is to find a comfortable place right here and embrace the moments that lead me here – because really now, im sure they come with some lesson and good memories (the ones that get you all teary). Maybe the point is not to wonder why I occasionally find myself here but rather look forward to them cause hell, I know they are coming.

(habit nods his head in agreement)

*sip*…*gulp*

So, is that what we decide habit?

Is this how it will be from now on?