the true Ms Bride

And so while I sit in a pond of growing debt, I cant help but wonder on choices made and on what the important things in life really are.

How is it that we define our happiness on the things we have? What happened to the days when simple was king and bargain was the plan? I suppose things like that were long trodden on by hungry profit makers and those who could not be bothered by the weeklings that gained most from the bargains and the simples.

There are 5 of us near me and while unspoken, I cant help but wonder if the long anticipated excitement was just another page of that fairytale stuff – who was the idiot that started on that ideal anyway?! On the carpet on yet another rainy day, the teacher would sit there and read to us of princess after princess whose biggest concern was some spell and step mother. Why did those stories not come with some sort of disclaimer to say while such concerns where unreal – what was to be expected was far more worse. Someone should have told us – together with other impressions given by such stories – that there would be no fairy godmother to fix, there would be no spell to break and there would defiantly be no prince to take it all away with a kiss. I say someone should have sat us down in the very next class to tell of what we would face instead.

We sat there and had our eyes glaze over at dreams of fairytales of our own. We were allowed to carry on and no one of the adult population dared to pop this bubble. Instead we sat in high school in time consuming guidance lessons on yet another SWOT analysing session (how the hell do I SWOT this!!!????). Somebody should have told us – told ME that I would one day be sitting in this puddle and while the first reaction would be to panic and maybe even try to bury my head in the sand – the best cause of action at this point would be to put on the damn tight swimming cap and hope I did enough breathing techniques to last me through this sea of the damed.

This is no longer a puddle and debt is not my problem! this has become a damn sea of untolds and the key, i hear, is to swim along…

Hi, my name is Ms Bride and I see a bridge to jump off… looking at the other 5, I ask – do you wanna join me?