Monday, August 23, 2010

SICK man dies ALONE...

- … And so his wife leaves him sick and alone on Friday to attend to another emergency back at her Mather’s. My car alarm goes off at 3:30am on Sunday morning and while peering out the window, we notice his bedroom lights on. Paying no attention to that and after making sure nothing was wrong with the car, we all go back to sleep clueless to the sad events that where the result of his lights being on at that time of morning.
Morning comes and after frantic knocks on his door by his brother, the police are called to discover his lifeless body - inside the locked, cold house - lying in bed, clutching a bottle of an energy drink…
                                         It’s confirmed… he has passed away!

Notice how there are so many unanswered questions in those bizarre events and yet the story gets worse as it unfolds around the “The man that died alone”

- … after the body had been taken away and the brother starts making calls, the sickening truth seeps out and although I'm hating the “dying alone” part, I'm sickened by the disgusting secret that was inside the walls of that house.
The brother is conflicted at what he should do now. See, as part of the calls that he makes, a very important one is made to his REAL wife and CHILDREN. Turns out alone man had told his legal wife that he was staying at his place of employment while he was shacked up with the lady we neighbours knew to be his wife...

Once again, I find myself deeply hurt and disgusted at the disapointment we humans have become. The bible shows how we were created as he superior creatures - to have domination over all other flying, sea and land creatures yet our behaviour as this system of things nears its end proves that we just may have succeeded in turning ourselves in to the worst kind of creature to walk the fact of the earth.

My Issues 1: the sick man ALONE

One of the things that I have always prided myself on living elokshini is the fact that, to some extent, the neighbours knew each other. Growing up, I loved the fact that when I came home from school and my mother was not home and I had no key, I could always go to the gogo at our front opposite and she would have a sandwich ready for me and show me to a room where I could take a nap and wait for my mom. When gogo passed away, our back opposite retired nurse was another safe place where I could wait instead of prying the streets and being a target to the badies that lurk in dark corners. I could wait there for as long as it took and our neighbours never complained or minded – in fact, sometimes, they insisted.

Yet, here is this man, that was left alone while sick to fend for himself. Could not this woman have alerted us that she had an emergency and ask for us to check in on the sick man? We could have made sure that he ate something for lunch and supper on Friday. We could have taken him breakfast on Saturday morning before we went about our daily activities, did lunch with him and supper before making sure pills are being taken before we went to bed. We could have done something when we saw the lights on past 10 or even 11 as my siblings were still up. That man could have been alive today had his “makwapeni” cared enough. I fully understand the picture I'm painting of the woman that always greeted and had well wishes for me but you please find a way to explain to me how the freaking hell you could do something like that to someone you pulled away from his real family so that he could be with you.

I have always held on to the believe that regardless of how mean or terrible you are, no one deserves to be alone. I think being alone is something that hurts enough to kill you on its own. I'm imagining the frame of mind that the man was in – feeling his condition worsen yet not being able to call out for help. The energy drink he was found with tells me that he was looking to get some source of strength so as to make it through the night. It is said that, when things are bad, we tend to reflect on our life – could the realization that he was left alone in that sick state have been the final nails to his coffin?

It gets me thinking too about you (you know who you are) – I think one of the things that almost killed me when hanging up the phone at 5am on that Saturday morning, after talking almost the whole night, was the thought that since you had messed up almost all the good you had going for you – you too could find yourself alone. Knowing your frame of mind as I hung up the phone drove me frantic too coupled with the thought that you would eventually give yourself a heart attack and die out there all alone with no one to call to for help…

How do we do this to each other? When will we eventually start missing that all too important human element that will make us care enough and think twice about the things we put each other through? So the woman didn’t know how things would turn out but still… How Do You Leave A Sick Person ALONE????

My issues 2: the SICK man alone

He had another LEGAL wife and KIDS?

The patheticness surrounding a cheating mate still carry on to amaze me! How do you commit to “happily ever after” only to end up hurting them in the cruellest way possible?

Regardless of how many times I hear about it, I fail to wrap my head around the makings of a cheating mate. In my book, that is the lowest act possible before we cross over the legal line… if you have seen my earlier posts on this issue, you will know that still today, I question the decision to do it and see consequences after. I still wonder how one’s mind works around to even justifying it or even carrying on with it and EVEN going as far as hiding it should you have become victim of human error.

I shudder to think what the poor wife is to feel when news of her husband’s infidelity reach her… Not knowing the full details, but imagine that she is at home looking after the children and building a pleasant home for her husband while he goes to work only to find that his work included performing duties that were unknown to her – ones that even went as far as going to another woman’s house every night and putting on a show so good that even the neighbours that see you daily do not catch on that he doesn’t belong there. This was not a fling or passing of time kind of thing – it was a slap to the face for he went as far as buildng a home with a strange woman.

How does she get closure from this when the ******** is not even around to answer for his actions.

Take it from a woman who knows – the passing of her man is the least of the wounds that she will have to heal so as to carry on functioning as a normal women with her head held high and with kids to be a role model too. I know that this will come very close to killing her too.

I suppose the question as to why we cheat still is to find a satisfying answer but regardless – I don’t think I can ever respect a person who cheats on their mate in any kind of way weather they deserved it r not. You SIMPLY do NOT cheat PERIOD!

My thoughts…

And so I find myself at conflict over weather him being alone in his last few slow moments are to be justified by his extra curricular activities.

As he lay there feeling his breath become shallower and him realising that he will not make it to day light, what do you suppose his last thoughts were? Regret over his achievement to humiliating his real wife and kids? Or the mess that he leaves his mistress in when she now has to defend and justify something they started together?

And what about if he could choose who to spend his last moments with – who do you suppose he would choose? His real wife? Or his mistress?

What I think...

Opinion omitted for indecisive reasons…

What do you think?

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